Trump jokes

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March 29th, 2018 at 6:24:36 PM permalink
rxwine
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 135
Posts: 7190
Jeopardy

The answer is:

Melania, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity

~
Name the one person still giving Trump oral pleasure nightly?
Nobody learned anything from the global financial crisis.
March 30th, 2018 at 5:10:44 PM permalink
rxwine
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 135
Posts: 7190
When people heard Trump was going to meet up with Kim Jung Un, how many people thought Dennis Rodman really is a better choice?
Nobody learned anything from the global financial crisis.
April 6th, 2018 at 2:25:57 PM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
Washington can't tell a lie.

Nixon can't tell the truth.

Trump can't tell the difference.
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
April 6th, 2018 at 3:38:28 PM permalink
JimRockford
Member since: Sep 18, 2015
Threads: 2
Posts: 527
Quote: Nareed
Washington can't tell a lie.

Nixon can't tell the truth.

Trump can't tell the difference.

Reminds me of a quote by William F. Buckley from the early 2000's:
"An optimist sees the glass as half full
A pessimist sees the glass as half empty
Donald Trump sees the glass and is mesmerized by his reflection in it."
Where is Joseph Mifsud?
April 6th, 2018 at 4:07:57 PM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
Quote: JimRockford
Reminds me of a quote by William F. Buckley from the early 2000's:
"An optimist sees the glass as half full
A pessimist sees the glass as half empty
Donald Trump sees the glass and is mesmerized by his reflection in it."


Good one.
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
April 9th, 2018 at 7:30:32 AM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
"You can't build a wall when your hands are too small." Vicente Fox's T-shirt.
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
April 9th, 2018 at 7:31:22 AM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
Jeopardy:

The answer is: Trump is stupid.



What is tautology?
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
April 17th, 2018 at 2:10:09 PM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
Q: What do you call former Trump employees?

A: Unemployable.
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
April 20th, 2018 at 12:58:39 PM permalink
Nareed
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 345
Posts: 12542
Kind of a repeat:

One day during the 2016 campaign, Trump’s plane encountered a very bad hailstorm. First the plane was shaken this way and that, in very bad turbulence. Then the torrents of water and ice coming down killed one engine. Finally the second engine died.

The pilots try desperately to restart the engines as the plane slowly loses altitude. Then the captain announces “Hold on tight, folks. We’ve lost both engines, and we’ll try to dive to force enough air in them so we can start them again.”

The plane enters a steep dive, gaining more and more speed every second, breaking through the storm clouds. The passengers, including Trump, can see the ground rushing up to smash them into bits.

Suddenly both engines roar to life and the pilots pull out of the dive. Inertia keeps the plane going down, as the engines ever so slowly spool up to provide thrust. The plane comes within fifty feet off the ground before it manages to gain altitude again.

The pilots head to the nearest airport and land safely within a few minutes. No one is hurt or injured.

The first person to disembark the plane is a three-foot tall man with orange skin and a bad comb over. He’s wearing clothes that are many sizes too large for him.

“Who is that?” a ground crew man asks the pilot, pointing at the short man.

“Oh, that’s Donald Trump.”

“I didn’t realize he was so short.”

“He’s not. He just had the shit scared out of him, that’s all.”
Donald Trump is a fucking liar
June 12th, 2018 at 7:06:41 PM permalink
rxwine
Member since: Oct 24, 2012
Threads: 135
Posts: 7190
Coincidently "Little Rocket Man" is Melania's bedroom nickname for Donald.
Nobody learned anything from the global financial crisis.
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