The Insanity of the United States Postal Service

Quote: DRich

Face, at your post office or substation would you be the employee voted most likely to go postal?

Certainly not. I may be quick to anger and my well of hate seemingly endless, but I am quite polite in general. Fishing With Face, the BVI threads, that guy is who lives at my core. The cynical misanthrope that sometimes emerges or even stays awhile... he was made. The good guy just "is".

And no one knows me. I only talk to 2 of the 40 people there, and that's only because they will possibly be involved with my day. When we're short a guy and have to split a route in addition to ours, we'll have a little planning pow-wow so we can do it efficiently. All the coffee gatherings or communal foods or chat sessions, I ain't got time for it, not interested if I did.

I suspect very few have any opinion of me at all as there's just not the contact. Most probably know me as the crazy hair guy, perhaps a few close to my case might know me as the guy who can compose a sentence comprised completely of curses. But that's as far as it could go as I don't involve myself in social aspects (though that may be the reason I catch a few votes ;))

"Going postal" also implies shooting the place up. I don't even fantasize about that; I can't imagine ever finding that desirable. I could pretend it's my gunner side and my responsibility, but... lol, if you piss me off that much, I wouldn't be satisfied with just a bang. I never fantasize about shooting or stabbing or hitting with a car or pushing off a building. When I get mad, I want to fight. I hit s#$%. Never kick, very rarely throw, I need to strike it. Without the physical release, there is no relief.

Quote: Fleastiff

Probably be voted the most likely to get out and fix their trucks properly.

We're not allowed to touch them. Even if we're stuck and just need to dump 10psi out of the rears, we can't do it. Unless it is specific to the very act of getting mail in the box, it is verboten. Even dismounting to service a box out of reach is a no-no; you dump it and bring it back tomorrow.

Obv many ignore because it's a right pain in the ass to get serviced when you need it, and the clock's always running. But then you're liable for damages and aren't covered if you hurt yourself doing it.

I live like 1500 feet from a post office, yet they seem to deliver my packages at the end of their route, so it must be the last delivery of the day.

Wouldn't it make more sense to shed weight from the truck on the way out and conserve more fuel?

Quote: rxwine

I live like 1500 feet from a post office, yet they seem to deliver my packages at the end of their route, so it must be the last delivery of the day.

Wouldn't it make more sense to shed weight from the truck on the way out and conserve more fuel?

They will hold packages for pickup
if you ask them. They do for me.

Quote: rxwine

I live like 1500 feet from a post office, yet they seem to deliver my packages at the end of their route, so it must be the last delivery of the day.

Wouldn't it make more sense to shed weight from the truck on the way out and conserve more fuel?

I doubt it would make much difference in fuel use. It is about routing.

Quote: rxwine

I live like 1500 feet from a post office, yet they seem to deliver my packages at the end of their route, so it must be the last delivery of the day.

Wouldn't it make more sense to shed weight from the truck on the way out and conserve more fuel?

So, you want an ever changing route dependent on parcels? Gimme your address so I can send you a punch in the nose =p

Weight is taken care of the moment you ship it. Sometimes we "lose out" because your robot sex doll happens to be the last stop and we done toted it all over town. Other times we win out because your gross of dick pills is first out of the gate. It all evens out, I imagine.

The route is way more important, IM(ignorant)O. When something as simple as a flier adds a full 90-120 minutes to your day, a change in the route and the inefficiency it would create would waste way more gas than toting an extra 60lbs. And your neighbors would lose their collective s#$%. Seriously, you have no idea just how fragile some people are, and the mail coming at 1130 instead of 1000 is enough to put some on suicide watch.

Plus you're talking changes way up the line, and of everything. The entire sort would have to be flipped, my entire case would have to be flipped, I'd have to do half of it in reverse because the boxes would then be on the wrong side of the road...

There's one answer to changing your order in the route, and it's the only one we ever give the customer - Move. Earlier, later, that's the only way it's happening. Sell your house and move lol.

Sundays have some leeway. As it's package only, we're free to follow the turn-by-turn, or, if you're like me and are familiar with the roads / can do everything better than everyone/everything else, we can make our own routes. I always make my own because I'm smarter than MapQuest, but even then, it's for my benefit, not USPS's. I don't care if I have a palate of iridium in the back, if it being on the tail end gets my day done faster, then that's when it'll be delivered.

And really, these things do 0-60 in a tick under 30 seconds, only weight 2,800lbs, are only a 4 banger, and STILL get just 10mpg. There's not much you could do to hurt efficiency any further ;)

Quote: Face

So, you want an ever changing route dependent on parcels? Gimme your address so I can send you a punch in the nose =p

Hah ha ha, hey you punch like a girl.




Here's an idea!

Quote:

And really, these things do 0-60 in a tick under 30 seconds, only weight 2,800lbs, are only a 4 banger, and STILL get just 10mpg. There's not much you could do to hurt efficiency any further ;)

I smell victory at the track. You think they'd miss it for an evening?

Quote: Face

Sometimes we "lose out" because your robot sex doll happens to be the last stop and we done toted it all over town.

NOBODY puts babe in a corner.

Don't get it. What does a film clip Swayze and Cabaret's daughter have to do with the post office?
Life is getting more and more confusing for me. Perhaps I should stop getting older.

We all know t he post office is a bloated bunch of clock watchers that will soon start offering welfare checks, meals on wheels, and also Senior Services....don't you just all look forward to that.

Quote: Fleastiff

Don't get it. What does a film clip Swayze and Cabaret's daughter have to do with the post office?
Life is getting more and more confusing for me. Perhaps I should stop getting older.

We all know t he post office is a bloated bunch of clock watchers that will soon start offering welfare checks, meals on wheels, and also Senior Services....don't you just all look forward to that.

It's hard if you didn't follow along. It seems according to our resident postal dude, that Rx had ordered a sex doll and he wanted it delivered first on Face's route, instead of being stuffed into a corner of the van, in the sweltering heat and being unloved. To which I just assumed when she arrived and was inflated would look like Jennifer Grey [from the show Dirty Dancing] and be nicknamed "Baby", [seemed appropriate]. Also I remembered the line "no one puts baby in a corner" and I could see how someone could be upset. Who wouldn't be ? It's almost like the post office doesn't care.

The post office don't care 'bout nothing but pensions.

Yeah, Jennifer Grey was Joel Grey's daughter... Joel Grey was the emcee in Cabaret's Kit Kat Klub.

They now have sex dolls that are hooked up to the internet ...(boggle's the imagination, don't it.)

Wonder if those adult toy stores make any money these days? I doubt even adult video stores make much money these days.